Six Things You Need to Know about Working with a Coach

Synopsis: Nothing has taught me more about achieving goals than coaching others to achieve theirs. In this post, I’ll share the top six things you need to know about working with a coach.

Achieve goals using a professional coach — *Working with a coach is a different dynamic than the one you might have with a boss or mentor even though it may seem similar in concept.*

#6. You don’t have to know your goal to work with a coach.

You may not know exactly what your ultimate goal is. And thankfully, knowing your goal isn’t required to start working with a coach. Maybe you just know something needs to change in your career or your personal life. You and your coach will discuss what isn’t working and why you feel that change is needed. Together, you can develop a plan from that conversation. And through that plan, your goal will be a natural outcome. It’s reverse engineering. Your coach will make sure it’s specific, measurable, achievable, relevant and time-bound. And that’s just SMART.

#5. You’re being too hard on yourself.

When we set a goal, we tend to give ourselves credit for only the big sweeping actions we take that leapfrog us toward our goals. If we haven’t moved the needle significantly, we feel we haven’t made any progress. That’s just not the case. The reason we don’t hammer down on the gas pedal when a streetlight turns green is it’s uncomfortable for us, our passengers, and even the drivers around us. If you don’t feel immediate change and whiplash when you’ve started working toward a goal, that’s okay. A coach will be able to point out how each action you’ve taken is progress, even if it’s just changing the rudder of your attitude from “I have so far to go” to “I’m doing it.” That subtle shift in thought will take you far. And that leads me to my next coaching lesson.

#4. Great things are accomplished one small step at a time.

Everything doesn’t have to change all at once, and the best and most lasting changes don’t happen immediately. There are dozens if not hundreds of tiny actions that move us closer to accomplishing our goals. Keep a list of every action you need to take that gets you closer to your goal. And the smaller the steps you break those actions down into, the better. Did you write a list of three contacts to network with? Check. Did you contact one person on the list? Check. Did you set an appointment to talk to someone? Check. It all adds up. And every time you review your list to check off an item, you’ll see all of those actions accomplished, giving you the momentum to keep going.

#3. Lists are the best tool you can use.

There was a craze over the past couple of years around bullet journaling. There are countless tools, journals and planners out there developed by motivational coaches for goal setting and tracking. I’ve probably tried at least half a dozen or so myself. What I’ve learned is you don’t need some fancy tracker, journal or planner. In fact, the easier you make the tracking, the more likely you are to do it. The important thing is to keep that list! See #2 again if you need a reminder about why. Your coach likely will have a few trackers and lists they’ll ask you to use. It doesn’t matter whether it’s handwritten on a note pad, typed into a document, tracked in an app on your phone, or charted and forecast using pivot tables in Excel. (I’m kidding about Excel.) The point is: just make sure you’re continually reviewing your list to add new items and check off completed items. One action often leads to another action. For instance, if you’re networking and you’ve added a name to your list, you may also want to review that person’s LinkedIn profile prior to your meeting or outreach. This is where reviewing your list is key.

#2. You’re hiring a coach to keep you accountable to yourself.

It’s very easy to let life, your career, your family, and/or your hobbies crowd out your goals. You hire a coach to help you stay accountable. You’ll meet regularly in person or by phone to check in and discuss your progress. Things may come up from time to time that slow you down, but don’t let that be a reason to put off your coaching. That’ll only set you back further. As a coach to several busy professionals, I never mind when appointments have to be rescheduled even more than once. And I’m also happy to use our meeting time to review the list, brainstorm additional actions, and discuss what may be getting in the way. Just because you don’t feel ready for a coaching appointment, doesn’t mean you should cancel. After all, you hired your coach to keep you accountable and get you back on track.

#1. Your coach plays a different role than your boss or mentor.

Working with a coach is a different dynamic than the one you might have with a boss or mentor. Although a great boss can exhibit qualities of all three, a manager has to balance your needs with the needs of the team and company. When those conflict, the company is the priority. What’s good for you might not be good for business. A mentor is more similar to a coach than a boss. But, generally, you select your own mentors. A mentor may be someone who’s already accomplished what you’d like to accomplish or someone you simply admire. A mentor shares her experience with you and may even introduce you to others who can help you in your career. She may help you gain additional experience or achieve a promotion. A coach has specific training in active listening to help you achieve your goals and a variety of tools to help you. A coach will assess the steps it’ll take and give you specific tools to move you forward and track your progress. If accountability, consistent momentum, and specific tools are what you’re looking for, then working with a coach may be the best way to reach your goals. But nothing precludes you from working with all three! In fact, I recommend all three, and a coach can help you make the most of each.

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Nelida